Moving Mountains With Small Stones

Sometimes there are phases in life that seem more like a huge mountain to climb. I have no idea how I am going to climb that thing. It’s scary and huge. I know where I want to be… I want to be at the top, but with every step, it feels like I slide further down.

I have had many “mountain moments” in my life but right now infertility and my pregnancy losses are my “mountains.” It is so hard and emotional. I often question my self-worth and my purpose. I have no idea if we do IVF, or do we not? If we do decide on IVF how do we pay for it? How life threatening is it for me to be pregnant again? And so many other things to consider.

I realized that a huge success or a huge accomplishment never happens all at once. Isaiah 28:10 says “For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little.”

Little steps and little consistent choices every day are going to get me where I want to be!

Here are some little steps/choices I have thought of to help get through infertility:

1. Remember who you are. I believe we are all children of a loving and all-knowing God with a divine purpose. Praying, reading my scriptures, and participating in my church are all things to help me remember who I am.
2. Learn! Learn as much as you can to prepare for IVF, or whatever treatment you are interested in.
3. After you have all your information make a plan.
4. Take one appointment and one small milestone at a time.
5. Serve others, when I do this I often forget about my worries or they become easier to bear.
6. Consistently write in my gratitude journal. (go back to see my post on this!)
7. Keep building your talents and skills to help you be the best you. We are all here for an amazing individual purpose! It is our job to find that purpose and do our best to crush it!
8. TREAT.YO.SELF! You’re amazing and doing great things. Be kind to yourself. Plan a fun date night or girls night. Buy yourself some ice cream. Take a hot bath with a bath bomb.
9. Remember you’re doing better than you think you are and things will always work out for your good.

How do you take one step at a time to climb your mountains?

Ways To Support A Friend Or Family Member Going Through Infertility

I have been really blessed to have great friends that have really helped me. They are like my earthly angels. I know it can be hard to know how to love and support someone that is struggling with infertility and pregnancy loss. Here are some ideas to help support those around you.

1. Be a really good listener.
2. Appropriate things to say:
   1. "I'm sorry."
   2. "I am always here if you need to talk."
   3. "What do you need?" or "What can I help you with?"
3. After asking what they need, follow through! Here are some ways to help:
   1. Bring flowers or a thoughtful gift.
   2. Offer to watch their older kids so they can rest.
   3. Go to difficult doctors appointments with them.
   4. Offer opportunities to get them out of the house. 
4. Bring lunch or dinner meals.
5. Allow them to talk, cry, or vent when they need and validate their feelings.
6. Be patient.
7. Support their decisions to either continue treatment or stop.
8. Keep checking in as weeks and months go by and let them know you care.